Tag Archives: Marriage

Tips To A Successful Marriage

15 Apr

When couples enter the sanctity of marriage, they are filled with hope for a future full of love and laughter. And infact, the initial few months of marriage are representative of all they have ever desired and wished for. A newly-married couple is so engrossed with each other, that sharing, understanding and compromise becomes the order of the day with the only goal of making each other happy and contented. But this bliss of the first few moths often fails to last and relationships often get into trouble due to the indifference of both the individuals on certain major points.

Nurturing A Relationship
The problem often lies in the thinking of the partners with regards to the institution of marriage. It is not realistic to desire for the best things in a marital union without putting in the least amount of effort. On the other hand, couples must work towards attaining happiness. Happiness in marriage can only be achieved through the pathway of love and care. This gives rise to the concept of Marriage Care. Indeed, Marriage Care is as simple as it sounds. Marriage requires equal amount of nurturing as does a newborn. When couples care for their marriage, it shows that they respect themselves and each other, and care enough to work things out for the best.

Miracle Of Love
Love is the key ingredient in Marriage Care. Love prompts respect, understanding, forgiveness and humility. Love makes you tolerable towards your partners’ imperfections and also sometimes seems to make them almost perfect for you. Learning to accept and forgive with humbleness is a part of being in love and this also doesn’t allow pride to interfere in the smooth functioning of a relationship.

Marriage is the union of two distinct individuals that have two different sets of opinion, thinking and views. And when the two start living together, their differences are likely to cause problems. So, here comes the art of practicing patience, which is also an important component in successful marriage. Patience is an attitude and a positive quality that proves the strong-will and mental strength of an individual. Patience is derived from self-respect and respect for your partner. A patient approach helps in achieving solutions and compromise, which ranting and abusive behavior can never beget.

Reasons Leading To Failure Of Marriage

  • Lack of understanding
  • Lack of patience due to irritability caused by stress and tension at work
  • Lack of quality time together
  • Imposing one’s likings and views on the other
  • Lack of space within relationship for individual growth
  • Lack of encouragement and support

Marriage Care Tips To Save Your Marriage

  • Do not impose. Your partner has his/her individual likings and opinions. He/she will feel and do things differently. Suggestions and advices may be welcome but criticizing your partner for not following your instructions and edits.
  • Be open to your partner’s ideas, suggestions, opinions, views, etc, and respect it.
  • Be open and share your thoughts with your partner. Ask for advice, opinions, and suggestions. Interaction with your partner is of utmost importance and that is what makes him/her feel wanted and important.
  • Spend quality time together. Spend lazy evenings doing nothing, watching films, preparing dinner, etc. Make your partner feel special.
  • Give space to your partner. The partners should sometimes take time off from each others’ company and address to issues pertaining to their individual self. If your wife wants to go shopping with her friends, let her. If your husband wants to have a boy’s night out with old friends, let him.
  • Have faith in your partner. Politely asking instead of doubting and accusing, will get you straight and honest answers.

Last but not the least, be a perfect friend to your partner. ‘Friends first and couple later’ should be taken as the golden mantra for Marriage Care. Friendship gives a whole new perspective to marriage. In friendship, couples tend to become more tolerant, understanding and forgiving of each other.

Marriage After Divorce: Making the Move

23 Nov

Falling in love, getting married, having your first baby-these are a few things that many of us consider as a one-time event in our lives. While most of these things are actually not possible because you cannot turn back time but remarrying after divorce and falling in love are possibilities that you can definitely explore. Marrying again comes with its own set of challenges that may sound difficult to begin with, but actually this is the second chance that life offers you to spend your life with someone and cohabit again. This article looks at the common issues, doubts and fears faced at the time of remarriage and how to deal with them.

Cutting Away the Strings from The Past

For a remarriage to be successful you need to clear the issues from the past and that includes sorting out every aspect of your previous marriage. To be emotionally ready once again you need to take the financial, geographical and social factors into account and for that you can make use of the following tips:

  • Consider this marriage as a completely new take on life. Be open to fresh challenges, adjustments, compromises and changes by welcoming these with open arms.
  • Leave the old routines behind. It helps to move on.
  • Move into a new house or place as it will help you to forget the old memories and lessen your attachment to the old.
  • Let go off the negative thoughts. Your first marriage may have broken down due to any reason but that does not mean you can languish in the fear of making a mistake.

Making A New Beginning

  • You need to forget the past but remember the mistakes and weaknesses of your previous marriage to ensure that these are not repeated again.
  • Be more open and vocal about your feelings. Keep the communication channels open for both sides and know your partner completely to avoid any misunderstandings. If that sounds difficult, you can take premarital counseling sessions to sort out everything before taking the plunge.
  • If you have a child from your previous marriage or have a financial arrangement with your previous partner, do sort it out first with them. Also, make sure that the person you are marrying is comfortable with any new arrangement.

Getting married again is your second chance at having a partner who will make your life beautiful. If it is the second time for your partner as well, then you need to accept the transitional changes occurring with them too. There are more chances of a remarriage being successful as you are aware of the most common issues that may have marred the first one. So, go ahead and make the most of it.

The Journey Towards A Successful Marriage

29 Oct

Are you planning to tie the knot soon? Is your would-be spouse a complete stranger? Then it is time to know them. You do not want to spend the rest of your life with someone whose name is the only thing you know. Marriage is a long journey, both for the boy and the girl, and before embarking on this journey, it is essential to know the thoughts of your would-be life partner and also to let them know yours.

Here are some tips to help you know your future partner better:

Take A Family Trip

Plan a family trip, where you and your future spouse can get to know each other and the family’s better. It is essential that your families gel well together because if they don’t, then it can lead to marital problems later. Plan a fun trip together, spend some time with your future spouse and their family and see what you can do to adjust better in their family.

Go For A Date

After you have been on a family trip together and you feel it is time to spend some time alone to get to know each other better, then go for a date. It can either be a lunch date or a candle light dinner. During the lunch or dinner, discuss about each other’s likes and dislikes and discuss about your future plans, related to your career, dreams, etc. You also need to decide who would handle which domestic responsibilities.

Reveal Your Past

A marriage begins with trust and ends when that trust is broken. You should keep in mind that if you keep your past life hidden from your future spouse, then it would hurt both you and your partner in the long run. How would you feel, if you find out after ten years of your marriage, that your partner has hidden some truth about their life? It would hurt, yes. That hurt would pretty soon turn into a quarrel. To avoid any quarrels or arguments in the future, it is better to share your past life with your partner and accept it gracefully. Everybody has a past. You too have. So, do not hide anything and exercise the right to ask your future spouse about their past life.

Should You Really Marry?

After you have met each other’s families and have discussed major issues, it is time to decide whether you really want to get married to that person. Evaluate your would-be spouse’s personality, character and his/her attitude towards you and your family. Think over what you have discussed and make your decision wisely.

Discuss Family Planning

After you are sure that this is the person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life, you can get down to discussing personal and intimate matters. Note down things that you and your partner would and would not do after marriage. Discuss when you want to start a family and how big you want it to be. Decide your honeymoon destination, where you would settle after marriage and your future plans.

After following these easy steps to understand your would-be life partner better, it is time for you to tie the holy knot. Your wedding day has now arrived and make it memorable so that it is the most important and happiest day of your life.

Custom of Indian Marriage

5 May

The custom of marriage is believed to be the most sacred in the Indian society. The institution of marriage binds men and women together for the rest of their lives. Marriage also provides social permission to the couple to have sexual relationship and have children. Being a religious sacrament, marriage in India is obligatory to the Dwijas.

According to the Hindu law, marriage is also a civil contract and is essential for every Hindu for repaying their social and parental debts. Marriage has always been a holy union in Hindu religion and is also necessary for salvation and performing religious duties. Hindu marriage is a pious institution and don’t dissolve even after the death of one of the partner.

In Hindu religion, marriage is among the most important ‘Sanskaras’ or Hindu Sacraments that a person needs to perform during the lifetime. Marriage is taken as a sacred duty, which every Hindu has to perform. Getting your children married after the age of puberty becomes a moral responsibility of the parents.

The Vedas state that the couple should experience dharma together and should also sit aside in every religious ceremony. Any pooja or yajna is not complete until the couple sits together and worships their deity. A man cannot enter Grihastashram without marriage. Once a man enters Grihastashram through the institution of marriage, he is liable to attain full development in life. In Hindu marriages, Dharma comes first while sex has given secondary importance.

The major forms of Hindu marriage include:

Polyandry

This form of marriage states that one wife is regarded as the wife of all the brothers. It also gives all of them complete right of having sexual relation with her. Although, the custom is ancient but is still prevalent among the Todas.

Polygamy

As per this system, one man can have more than two wives at a time. Polygamy is very much popular among the Muslims in the country. Rajas in Hindu culture have also followed this system in ancient days. However, later on polygamy was considered a crime under the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955.

Monogamy

Monogamy refers to one man one wife system, which is a main custom of Indian marriage. This system involves high affection, devotion and sincerity among the couple. Children are also given proper attention under this custom.

Companionate Marriage

This system doesn’t exist now and it involves two persons who get married on the basis of mutual understanding. This type of marriage can be dissolved with mutual consent if there are no children.

Experimental Marriage

In this form of marriage, both the partners first find out the compatibility with each other before settling down in a relation.

All this gives a clear idea about the custom of Indian marriage and also make you understand how sacred this institution is. However, the customs have changed from time to time, but their essence and meaning is still the same.

Arrange Marriage

18 Mar

The word ‘marriage‘ has a sacrosanct notion attached to it. The nuptial bond has been a part of the world since ancient times. It is considered to be a heavenly bond that has blessings of almighty showered on it. Whether it’s a Hindu, Christian or any community’s marriage, it is broadly divided into two main categories: Love Marriage and Arranged Marriage.

What do you understand by arranged marriage?
It is basically a marriage that is fixed by people associated with the girl and the boy. The people who play the main and active role in the arranged marriage are the parents or the elders of the family. The participation of the boy and the girl is minimal in the fixing up of the marriage.

How does it go about?
Elders of the family select a match and then fix a meeting. After everything is settled between the two families, date of the ceremonies is fixed. The marriage procession is celebrated with great pomp and show. Everything is conducted under the supervision of the elders and as per their will. As everything has its pros and cons, an arranged marriage also has its positive and negative aspects. From the time immemorial there has been a constant debate on the matter whether arrange marriage should be performed or not.

Why Arranged Marriages are preferred?

  • Elder people have their years of experience so they will find a match suitable after examining even the minutest details and ensuring complete compatibility
  • Arrange marriages are considered to be more stable than love marriages
  • As marriages are believed to be the merging of two families so the chances of harmony between the two increases in arrange marriages

Drawbacks of Arranged Marriages:

  • If the marriage is performed under the pressure of the parents it might not attain the marital bliss
  • A forced marriage ends up in fall-apart relationships
  • Couples are not able to understand each other as they do in the love marriage

In most of the families arranged marriage is a part of their customs and values. Not adhering to it brings disgrace to the family name. Thus our write up provides you a complete idea of what an arranged marriage is along with its pros and cons.

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