The main pillars of a relationship are love, trust and understanding. For some of us who take this for granted, relationship can turn out to be a nightmare. Most of the failed relationships are due to an additional burden of relationship fear; this could be fear of losing themselves, or the fear of getting separated. But, in reality, there’s just no ground for such fear, it is something that is born out of insecurity that can destroy what could otherwise have been a perfect relationship.
Fear of Intimacy
For a lot of people, the fear of intimacy i.e. the feeling that they do not deserve love can disrupt a relationship. To conquer this fear, you need to think positive. Being in a relationship is not just about giving love, its means receiving as well. If you are unable to give or receive love, there are real chances that you could end up pushing your partner away.
To build a healthy relationship, you need to get close to your partner, to open up with them, to understand how and what they need from a relationship and how you can help in sustaining it. It may be difficult at first, but as you share your thoughts and feelings with each other, the closer you may get to each other.
Fear of Identity Loss
Some fear that when in a relationship they may lose their identity. Well, since you are an equal half in the relationship, you stand an equal responsibility for making a relationship work. To get rid of this fear, you need to understand that it takes two people to make a relationship work. If you feel your partner is taking advantage of you, you need to set boundaries for what you may allow and what you may not. If your partner is unable to respect you for ‘who you are’ and makes no effort to make the relationship work, then you would need to consider whether it is fruitful to carry forward the relationship or not.
If you have a fear then it is better to accept it and accept the fact that you have a problem. Once accepted, you would need to deal with it with an open mind; handling relationship fears with a closed mind can make it worse. Sharing is the universal remedy whenever you experience a roadblock in your relationship. Talk to your partner about it and never feel embarrassed.